What's Next?

It seemed like a great idea at the time (doesn't it always?). The Colorado Rockies. Just you and your bike. For 485 miles. Aspen. Steamboat Springs. Salida. Crested Butte. Glenwood Canyon.

The Rockies are mountains, for those of you who don't know. Did I mention that I'm from the mid-west? In the mid-west we have hills. Not mountains. Hills. On my bike (ridden primarily in the mid-west, and by primarily I mean only) I'm no great force on hills ... and that's me being kind to me. Still, the Colorado Rockies - ON MY BIKE. Who *wouldn't* go?

Maybe me. I mulled it over for a few months. What finally sold me? Other than my cycling mentor and friend who, to protect his identity, I'll call merely John F. Martin, Jr, telling me how beautiful it would be and that I really COULD do it? Other than the undeniable sine-wave-shaped urge to venture Outside the Radius apparently being at its apex? Other than the fact that I've never stepped foot in Colorado and always wanted to see it? Other than the fact that I'd been lucky enough to remain gainfully employed while 10% of Americans (and 90% of my colleagues) aren't and could still afford such a vacation?

What finally sold me was a long e-mail conversation with the owner of the tour company, John Humphries of Lizard Head Cycling. I was trying to objectively determine if I had a snowball's chance of doing this ride and was expressing that Colorado has dictionary definition, Discovery Channel, MOUNTAINS, not mid-west hills, but MOUN-TAINS, the likes of which I've never even seen. In the middle of John's response (after a few other things which I'll leave out) was this:

"The mountains are indeed challenging. Cyclists usually connect with themselves in the mountains after enduring a period of suffering. The yin and yang of it all is what brings about the elation!"

What word caught my eye and sucked me in? Suffering!? I can do Suffering! And while John Humphries didn't know it, I have a grand plan someday of being very Zen. Over the next month I himmed and I hawed. I let it simmer on a back burner. It kept me up some nights. I checked the budget. And checked it again. I baited a few close friends with the idea, just to see if they'd say without thinking (as you can only count on close friends to do) 'Colorado Rockies? YOU?!' and roar in laughter (they didn't). A few weeks later it was time to decide: I pulled out my usual trick for deciding something I can't decide: I pretend I've already decided, and then I watch the video of it play out in my head. When I pretended I chose to go on the trip the video was absolutely horrifying - MOUN-TAINS remember? ... but when I pretended I chose NOT to go? ... it was even worse. The next day I sent in my deposit.

So here we are. 5 months and 3 weeks later. We leave on Saturday (5 days from today). We. Let me tell you about the cast of characters, at least the ones I know of so far ...

John F Martin Jr: Infamous local cycling mentor to me and a billion others. He just knows cycling. He's done a lot of it. A. Lot. Of. It. For the record, he also knows running, swimming, triathlons, marathons, and how much oil a 2002 Ford Escape takes. He can be grouchy as the grinch when he wants to be, but you have to just ignore that - it's just a clever disguise. He's also used some of his leisurely retirement time to figure out the GoCam (a birthday present from my brothers) that will hopefully produce some pretty exciting hi-def handlebar video of the gorgeous Colorado MOUN-TAINS (but NOT, hear me, NOT of me Wile E Coyote'ing it off a cliff-side!)

Todd Larson: One of the killer riders in our little cycling posse. I usually see Todd at the start of rides, long enough to say hello and casually wonder if he remembers my name. Once in a while I'll catch up and chat with him as he's sitting on the side of the road McGyvering his rear derailleur so he can have one (1) operational gear to finish the remaining 75 miles of 12% grade hills. He's also a killer golfer who someday I hope to finagle into teaching me a thing or two about that silly game.

John Sada (aka Sada, because we have way too many Johns here): Sada is usually done with his ride, home, showered, fed and napping by the time I get to the first turn on the cue sheet. He's got the best cycling legs in town (sorry JFM and Todd, he does), and it's obvious he works hard! Watch him ride with his 8 (almost 9!) year old son, who clearly got his dad's cycling genes, on a sprint, up a hill and I DARE you to try not to smile - it's like drinking a gallon of milk in an hour: not humanly possible. I'll try to get some pictures of Sada at dinner because I'll obviously never see him out on the bike (unless I can set my shutter speed fast enough to catch the blur of his jersey off in the distance). I'll send him all the pics of the beautiful Rockies to enjoy afterward because he'll be riding too fast for them to even register on his retinas.

John Humphries, Owner Lizard Head Cycling Guides: I haven't met him yet but have exchanged countless e-mails and talked on the phone for what I'm sure he thought was way too long, and I have infinite respect for him doing what it is he loves to do (like being Zen, I have that hope someday too). The only other thing I can say about him at this moment in time is that I hope he doesn't seriously regret that he helped talk me into this. If nothing else, I hope I can offer him some good photos and/or video that he can use (anonymously and free of charge) on his website. I also hope that he can clear up the rumor about the guy who wandered off to take pictures and got left behind by the van (for the record, I heard he was retrieved in reasonably good health, only slightly delusional, some 30 days later, still walking down the mountain).

And it's still 5 more days until we actually even leave ... did I mention that this tour actually coincides with the first US Pro Cycling Challenge? And that several of the world's best riders, including Cadel Evans (the Australian guy who just won the 2011 Tour de France), will be out there. On the same MOUN-TAINS? I didn't? I will ...